I always wondered what the religious sisters, brothers and priests meant
when they said they had a "Calling" to enter the religious life. Well, i
must admit, i never gave it much thought. Only heard of it after
watching 'Sister Act', when the mousy novice asked Whoopi Goldberg "So,
how did you get your calling, Sr Mary Clarence?". My view of this
mysterious "Call" was that it's something that only happens to really
holy people, and i'm glad SOMEONE is answering it.. Certainly wasn't me.. I wondered whether
these people had some direct line to God or something, but i did not
speculate beyond that.
One and a half years after my last blog post, i have a theory on how that 'Call' might be... It's this overwhelming feeling of being loved by God and having my limited heart filled full with His infinite love. It's this tugging at the heart strings that no one else but God can satisfy my deepest desires. It's this Living Flame of Love that my moth-like self would love to plunge into, although chances of getting burnt is highly likely. Very surreal... And the most interesting part is that all this boundless love appeared out of nowhere! It was all a passive thing for my part. Just bumbling around happily, until my heart was overwhelmed with this flame of Love that burned all the way to the deepest part of my soul. (That's stealing a little from St John of the Cross, i must confess. But he describes it so accurately!)
One and a half years after my last blog post, i have a theory on how that 'Call' might be... It's this overwhelming feeling of being loved by God and having my limited heart filled full with His infinite love. It's this tugging at the heart strings that no one else but God can satisfy my deepest desires. It's this Living Flame of Love that my moth-like self would love to plunge into, although chances of getting burnt is highly likely. Very surreal... And the most interesting part is that all this boundless love appeared out of nowhere! It was all a passive thing for my part. Just bumbling around happily, until my heart was overwhelmed with this flame of Love that burned all the way to the deepest part of my soul. (That's stealing a little from St John of the Cross, i must confess. But he describes it so accurately!)
I spent most of my vocation as a doctor answering calls, so i guess i'm used to this. I'm not legally allowed to ignore any calls from hospital, although when i'm on holiday, i pretend i didn't hear the phone. I'm glad i decided to pick up THIS Call though.. And i'm grateful to my mum and sister for allowing me to pick up this Call... I know whatever sacrifice i will have to make to answer God's phonecall, my family will make greater sacrifices. Mind you, every relationship involves sacrifice. The trick is to be so deeply in love that the sacrifices don't feel like sacrifices, cos you're doing it for the One you love.
Dear God,
Help me to desire what You desire for me...
Amen.
2 comments:
Wonderful post. Thank you for sharing your beautiful thoughts. Like me, other young people may be able to relate, one way or another. God bless you and your family, and thank you for answering The Call. Audrey. xo
p.s. You write one heck of a blog!
Thanks Aud.. Waiting for your turn! Haha! ;) The tricky part is when God throws the ball back into your court and is waiting for you to respond to Him.. =)
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